i've been introduced to too many messed up situations,
they're growing out of control,
and are about to cause life time complications,
thinking so much got my brain pacing,
i keep so many feelings trapped inside,
that my heart cant stop racing,
i hear too many lies,
that make me feel like im in the wrong place,
constantly wiping the tears that drop from my face,
most of my stress caused by these guys,
who always think they know best,
and think they better than the next,
the head games they play has hurt me so bad,
and what's even more sad,
is inside i slowly die,
as for my heart will forever cry,
it's my time they're wasting,
and in the end it's not even worth the tears im always tasting,
time flies as i continue to drink and get drunk,
do drugs and get high,
it feels like i need drugs just to get by,
when im messed up i look past the bad,
and look for the good,
i've looked so hard within every situation,
but alone's where i often stood,
in the end nothing will change,
everything's too messed up,
and so it will remain,
as i feel i'm only parshly to blame,
the heartache and pain,
that a guy can put a girl through,
is enough to show how some guys can think the same,
i've waited my whole life,
for the true man who never came,
and of all the feelings i've felt,
none was guilt but maybe a little shame,
so again i turn to drugs,
some kept on the low,
which are the ones that show me other ways to go,
sometimes i wonder that if i wasn't on drugs,
would i have gone the same way?
but i guess i'll never know,
when i don't have drugs the deamons from inside continue to grow,
making me wish i never sold my soul,
these deamons took it's place,
which were sent from the devil below,
the day when everything goes right,
will be the day in hell when it snows,
and the day everything goes right,
will be the day in heaven when a smile on my baby's face glows,
will these deamons ever go,
or will they continue to stay,
until my insides harden and decay,
will they leave when i get to hell,
for i am already on my way,
to becoming hell's slave,
while i rot away in it's cave,
the deamons are confident with the job they are sent to do,
while they enjoy adding to the pain that everyday im put through,
the torcher won't stop until they walk me the rest of the way to my
grave,
i'm just another life god would rather not save,
because i ignored the right path he so long ago gave,
now and again i'm stuck in a death trap maze,
where at every dead end is a hole 6 feet deep,
where one day my dead body will sleep,
where one day my soul will rest in peace,
i look at the grave and think of my baby,
wondering if he can see all the tears that fall to my feet,
sometimes i wonder if these deamons already have me beat,
they're trying to take me over,
i don't care who doesn't believe,
they've been deep inside for so long,
i don't know why it is still phasing me,
but if i can survive long enough,
and stop myself from always getting stuck,
then one day these deamons and the devil himself will praise me,
and i can finally tell god i don't give a fuck!!

 
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