I wake up each morning

Not knowing what to say

Nor knowing what to do

Always feeling something new


Each day begins

With another bad start

And usually ends up

A conspiracy


I come home

Just to go to sleep

Hopefully awakening to

Something better


Avoiding the problems

At all costs

Just to keep me around

Just to keep me sane


If only I could sleep forever

Stay with the dreams

But no I must wake

To the nightmares of reality


Day by day

The days get worse

Night by night

The nightmares arise


Sleepless nights wasted

Writing away

Using writing as an excuse

Just to get away


Harmful thoughts

Run through my mind

Pushing them away

Harmful thoughts don’t go away


Things just go wrong

No one there to help me

I’m all alone

Just let me go insane




Just let me go

Run away

Go somewhere happy

Go somewhere sane


I wish I could be happy

Everyday I awake

But everyday just turns into

Another mistake


Bad choices

Wrong thoughts

Bad actions

Changes to be made


Everyone tells me to calm down

But they cannot understand

They do not go through my hell

They do not live my agony


No one feels my true pain

No one sees my dread

No one can help me

No one can salvage me


I drown my nightmares

With streams of tears

Drown out the yelling

With whimpering fears


Sometimes I just sit

And cry my heart out

Thinking everything will get better

Only lying to myself


Things always turn horrific

Filled with pain and sorrow

I just sleep and cry

Live the day till tomorrow


My days are not worth living

But I’m told otherwise

So I now live my days

Hiding under lies


 
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