What am I but your dogma’s distorted incarnation?
Lying here in this fucking hole called life and
Groveling at the feet of something I cannot grasp, cannot see
As your words slowly poison my mind-
Weren’t you the bastard who created me?
You who also drove me into unimaginable agony-
Who I once called Father I now call
Hate
That is what you are, isn’t it?
A son of a bitch who left me to suffocate
Under the weight of my sorrows-
I ran my fingers over your name in the book
For the longest time it was the only word I knew
You were always there to drink my tears
Then, as my hurt became unbearable, you disappeared-
I looked everywhere
I searched the book, searched the altar,
searched myself-
You left me when I needed you most,
Never returning to take away the pain
And I hate you for it
Hate you for every moment of my life
That you made me live
Hate you for every cut across my wrists
That you made me endure
Hate you for every hurtful curse
That you made me hear-
So now I turn away from your false light
Instead living in the shadows I am condemned to
And by the way, if you’re listening, Fuck you too

 
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