What happened to me?
I dont see the person I used to be.
I wish i was just dreaming,
but i'm bleeding, and i'm feeling pain.
I cut my hand
i didnt understand the rush,
or the happieness of this pain.
It was expirement at first
i didnt know i would do it again
and again
and again
but then....
I cut too deep one day
I was too scared to tell
I locked myself in my room
It poured against my hand clasping the cut
gushing oozing
running down my forearm
dripping onto my crossed legs
not slowly not steadly
but like a waterfall
running down my legs onto the snowey carpet.
now stained violet red
I felt dizzy queezy
the room was spinning
all the colors mixing
I felt myself shaking
i was shaking so hard
my neck hurt my head throbbed
my spine ached my hands numb my fingers changing colors
my toes turning purple
I felt my heart throbbing fast
suffocating getting slower
my eyes began rolling to the back of my head
I was gasping for air
my mom yelled my name shaking the door knob asking if i was okay.
no response
my skin cold and blue
still gasping
louder
louder
my dads banging on the door
my siblings crying
my friends coinsidentially making the phone ring at this time
blood everywhere now leaking to the 1st floor
BANG!!!
the door burst open
I heard a loud scream
my moms
my dad pressed me against him trying to stop the shaking
my siblings calling 911 on the cell
I tried my mom my dad my young ones
I couldnt breath
my skin now grey
my eyes froze
now staring into my parents sad eyes
i'm so cold
my heart slowing
1 beat every minute
my breaths became quieter
slower
my dad layed me down
he felt so warm against me
i shook no more
I tried I'm sorry
i was stupid
i let go
all went black
last i heard was my siblings scream
i felt my mom hugging me crying
my dad screaming in pain
my friend telling me
"dont let go...i need you" through the teliphone speaker hole
its too late for me
i'm sorry
i have to let go
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