I'll slit my throat
When I can't find the words
To make you see what you put me through
The air supply in my lungs
Can't hold on too much longer
If they will let me breathe
Maybe I'll find the right words to say
Or maybe you'll find out for yourself
My conscience told me to turn around
This wasn't where I wanted to be
I knew I was heading
In the wrong direction
I broke my legs falling for you
I stood by your side the entire time
But obviously that wasn't enough for you
You let me crumble to the ground
Smash my heart; grind it into the soil
Watch as the blood spews out
I'm killing myself
While trying to save you
I let my naivety get the best of me
You know my heart can't take it anymore
It kills me on the inside
To tell you how I feel
It wasn't supposed to hurt this much
You make promises
And I watch as you break them
Your tower of hopes and dreams
Slowly comes crashing down
And yet you still can't see
The blood on my wrists
Or the gash in my neck
Trickles of crimson fatality
Slowly spill out the truth
The pain is too much for me to bear
Blood gushes from my lips
Falling to the ground
Upon my lifeless heart
Maybe it still beats
You crushed it within an inch of my life
Betrayal and lies surface
You're too stubborn
To admit anything yet
I was always there
You know I was
You would have been dead by now
A lifeless, bloody corpse
Abandoned
On the side of the road
Just like me on the inside
Heart ground into the soil
Throat slashed by a guilty knife
Wrists slit open and into the veins
A big mistake
You can't fix it this time
I won't be there and you know why
So I say thank you for the scars
Every tear I've cried for you
Has made me learn
I beg you to change
But so reluctantly, you resist
Taking me to chance
Gambling my life for your needs
It was my problem, too
I thought you were someone to believe in
But what did I know?
I've put my trust in you
Just to have it ripped out of your chest
I've found you out
And you can't take it back
The pain and suffrage still seethes
There is nothing I can do
Or anything I could have done
You suffocate me
While you hold me in your arms
My last breath is wasted on you
And I'm throwing these words onto paper
I'm taking everything on the inside
And exposing it to the world
Something I have never done
I'm trying to show you how I feel
What I've lost in this
It's not just about you anymore
It was my life, too
But you just stood there
Oblivious to my pain
You could easily see it in my eyes
If you stayed sober long enough to care
I sealed my wounds with salt
And tasted the blood
Bitterness lingers on my lips
But I will no longer bite my tongue
I'm spilling everything this time
You don't know what goes on in my head
You don't understand me
You never will
You can never put yourself in my shoes
My life has been turned
Upside-down for you
Sanity has deserted my conscience
I've spilled my blood
Over and over again
All for you
I'm sick of all the promises
Broken and forgotten
So just sit back and watch me die
With my bloody corpse before you
Heart ground into the soil
Throat slashed by the guilty knife
Wrists slit open and into the veins
I'll never make the same mistake again
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