I remember... When I would walk down the street
Smiling
Happy
Sheltered from the harmful ways of this world.
Growing older I witnessed things I've never understood
Fighting
Death
Loss
Pain
I cried many times within those years
They were supposed to be filled with
Butterflies and rainbows
Now my years are filled with gloomy clouds and heartache
Where did life go wrong?
It seems as though I was happy and a normal child
Then all of a sudden I was struck with a hand of which I was created from
The womb of which I was born
Slowly life sunk into the deep oceans of Hell's fire
Loss of many shapes and forms came
Tears and hidden secrets crossed my path
Solitude found only in my cold dark room
Locked away from all life I kept myself
Growing older, injuries and fights grew
Accident prone and school outcast
I was never left alone, never
Skipping a few years of abusive relationships
And loss of good friends
I thought I found happiness
I found it within a blade of a knife
It wasn't happiness
That so called 'happiness' lead to many types of pain
Whether it be blood, tears, or isolation
I lingered in that supposed 'happiness'
For as long as I can remember
Trying once every few fort nights to stop from losing myself
Losing myself in the dark pits of what I never wanted to be
Gone like everyone else
Lonely
Hurt
And forgotten
Now I look at myself
Supposed to be a child still, but I feel as an adult
Mature for my age and lost still at fourteen
I never had a real childhood
For after attempts of suicide and therapy I am still
Lost in the hell I was never supposed to be in
I remember... When I was happy.
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