You told me you loved me
But that's all too late
You treated me as if I were a dog
But somehow, to you, it was alright
I was just fine, even while tears filled my eyes
I cried
Every fucking day I was with you
We fought, we silenced
We turned our backs after violence
You raped me
You ignored me
You made me feel as if I were only your action figure
But I'm not as strong as G.I. Joe
Or Spiderman
For if I was I wouldn't have devised a plan
A plan to end it all
To end my life
All because you chose to cause me strife
You said to me everything was fine
Even while I held a knife to my wrist
You said you treated me like a Goddess
Who the fuck do you think you are
You push a pain that almost killed me deeper into my wounds
You were the acid on my burns
You were the vinegar in my eyes
As I cried, and lied
'I'm okay, it was just a scratch,
A scratch from my dog, no, wait, my neighbor's cat!'
Now you tell me how you love me oh-so-much
How you miss the things you took for granted
The hugs and kisses and the forced sex moments
Did you ever notice my tears after I let go?
I wanted to die every time you told me I held on too much
Maybe it was a sign
A sign of 'I need you'
A sign of 'love me'
And then you call
Telling me how the day after tomorrow you'll end your life
And it's all my fault
My fault for putting you through so much pain
And discomfort
What about me?
I told you if I didn't stop getting hurt I'd die
And you just sat there and smiled
Like I would just fucking smile because it's so damn contageous
If you kill yourself
Part of me would be glad
Glad you're stupid enough to die over someone worthless like me
But part of me still cares
I really do care
I care enough to tell you to let go of me
Instead of me being told to let go for once
Leave me in peace and live out your life
But if you die my best friend Mr. Knife
Will come back to haunt me
So I dare you, die and set me free.

(Wow I needed to vent...)
 
Copyright © princesskill, All Rights Reserved