I hate my mirror
It proclaims the truth I don’t accept
Myself
It shines headlights down the road I’ve traveled
A road I never hope
To walk again

I started in a shiny new car
The lights worked
The paint was pink and
Gleaming starlight hope
Out of the windows
I could see the sun
But as I drove down that
Sunny, clean road
I was blinded by little-girl hopes
And didn’t see them coming
They beat down around me
Smashing the windows
Keying the paint
Beating the roof in on top of me
Squeezing
Suffocating
Cutting
Until I bled salt

After abandoning the car, I ran
I ran into the woods
Searching the indigo branches
For some protection
But glass shards only threaten
I had no salvation
Darkness closed in around me
And hope seemed like a bird
Flying south for the winter
Leaving me freezing and alone

Then I found a pair of shoes
Covered by leaves, rotting and decayed
These shoes were meant for me
I put them on, and though they were a little big,
Began walking
New energy poured into me
Like a hot drink on a cold day
Gradually, slowly, I became
Stronger
I had something I could do
Which was to keep walking

I soon passed out of the woods
And came upon a small village
Everyone admired my shoes, which now fit perfectly
As if they were truly made for me
I ran with the children and elders of the village
The children looked up to me
The elders respected me
I stayed in the village as long as I could
With people I knew would accept me
Of course, my heart was broken a few times
Some people ran faster
And expected me to fall
But even when I did I caught up
I ran my hardest
And was noticed for my effort

One day, a traveler came
To the village I now called home
Only for a summer he stayed,
But I saw in him something new and strange
Something I couldn’t get from those around here
Understanding, compassion
He didn’t know the road I’d traveled
And I loved him for that
Though my face and body were scarred
From the fight with trees and elements
He didn’t see them
All he saw was my blind faith
That something would go right
He was it

Now I live in moderate comfort
No longer scratching and fighting for my life
But accepting that
I will not be perfect
I still look in the mirror and remember
The long road
But that’s not my life
It’s just a memory

 
Copyright © starry_devotchka, All Rights Reserved