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the irritating lullaby of my despair
06/12/2005 @ 9:02pm
By:
nrmlpplskurme

the ballad of tenderness surged through my head in epochs of darkness.
but come what may, I managed to make it through it these daunting times
with pride and disgrace, the honor of failing and the joy of regress
brought a smirk to my face

I reminisce to times when I engraved things.
I etched these beauties in myself excruciatingly.
unfathomable and long.
truth be told, it never hurt. it continuously brought Me gratification.
it never really seemed to make anyone else ecstatic,
despite the fact that it made me content.
my friends reviled it. my parents were dishonored. my teachers disregarded
it. my heart treasured it

everything went wrong, it went so deep and down,
things just became arduous when I realized I wasn’t a child anymore.
your love became my obsession, and weakness my only possession
the easiness of life will be something forgotten, forever and always more

it isn’t that much pleasure in finding the remaining treasure
that is cursed with the joy that you have left behind
the evanescence of your life will be your demise.
the one last thing I need to tell you.

for all the words you never said and all the things I promised myself. I
wouldn’t do it.
they remind me that this lullaby is my conscience remembrance of the pain I
tolerated myself to endure.
and the pain that constantly kills me will be the fuel for the rest, but
don’t forget I will meet you where ever your conqueror sends you.

I will meet you where ever your demise propels you
and you will find me. in the most beautiful of the stages of death.
this is the beautiful I have always been,
and the revolting side of you is exposed.

I am divine
 
Copyright © 2025 nrmlpplskurme, All Rights Reserved


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