Here and there and everywhere;
All around I see
Things that no one else can sense,
Only observed by me.


When I was a boy much younger,
To my teacher I begged to know,
Why the plant by her desk
Always seemed to whistle so.


My teacher, she then glared at me,
Imagine my surprise,
When she sat me in the corner
And spanked me hard for telling lies.


There was this time when I was ten,
I went to a football game with my dad,
I asked him why all of those purple bunnies
Never ever got to bat.


He looked at me long and hard
Tilted, squinted, looked some more,
"Son," he said in a concerned tone,
"Why can't you be like the other boys?"


Last summer at the age of sixteen,
I looked into my girlfriend's eyes,
I asked her why all the Keebler Elves
Danced in her hair, making whipped cream pies.


She startled and slapped me following this,
Watching the sunset by the lake,
I was astounded when my question
So offended my lovely date.


Events like this through out my life
Have caused me a lot of stress,
But I don't know why I'm telling you,
You're just an orangutan in a summer dress.

 
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