Go away.
Why now? I was making some real progress. Its been awhile since I've
heard from you. You know I was doing ok long before now. So, why now?
Did I smile once to often? Pay less attention to you?
You're always there. Whenever I scream. Whenever I cry. Whenever I
think.
I swear I don't listen. But then it happens. I forget what you can do
to me. I let my guard down.
It seems innocent enough. A friend. Similar interests. Fun to be around. You
let me get comfortable, at ease. I let the friend know a little about me. In
turn, I get to know a little about my friend. You know a little about my
friend. Thats the problem.
You know.
I never figure it out until its too late. You push me. I ignore you. I take
that step. You become quiet. It should scare me, you quiet. I always
forget.
But you remind me. Soon enough. One step goes just past where you want me to
go. Oh, I recognize it right away. The end. You win.
I really hear you now. My mind will race forever. My friend won't
understand why I stop talking. Did I lose interest? My friend is not like
me. Who knows? Maybe a friend will be like me someday. Then I can listen for
real.
Not to you.
But to my friend. When I take that step and you make my head explode, maybe
I can let my friend see more of me. How would you handle that? Me, talking
to someone else. Out loud. Hhmm. Might be good. I'd sure like to try
it.
Who would listen to me? I doubt I would listen to me.
Some day. Unexpectedly, it will happen. A friend. A smile. That fateful
step.
But, this friend will know about you. Look past you. Then what?
Hopefully, you'll be silenced forever.
Go away.


 
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