I can't find any comfort for these feelings... I can't right myself from
this wrong. I can't take loving on my own. I'm trying so hard to distract
myself... but I can't. I'm hurting so badly, and nobody cares. I'm sick of
being told that everything I want and need is within arms reach, and then
reaching for it and never getting it... am I not good enough? Not worthy of
such love? Or is it all a lie... I can take being told I'm not good enough,
just say it... don't leave me wondering. Tell me you hate me, at least then
I know you are thinking about me. I'm breaking every single minute of the
day. I find distractions... to make me feel less broken. Nothing makes me
feel stable or comfortable. I'm screaming for the love and acceptance of
just one person, and they won't give it to me. Do you not understand that MY
HEART EXISTS SOLELY BECAUSE OF YOU?!?! I hate feeling weak. I hate ranting
to the point of confusion... Right now, I hate myself. I hate the tears
running down my face and the snot soaking into my shirt. But you... I
FUCKING LOVE YOU AND YOU DON'T EVEN FUCKING CARE IF I LIVE OR DIE.
 
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