My mind was stuck in neutral
and my heart was what was stuck in the gears.
I was so lost and worthless.
I couldn't find anyone who really understood me.
Who I could be myself around.
Who could love me.

I tried hoping
I tried wishing
I tried asking
All to no avail
So I turned to prayer.

I layed face down on my bed.
Eyes teary and red from the hours of crying.
Face scratched up from my frantic rage.
Feelings and emotions torn to pieces
from my, then, ever present destitution.
And heart broken from those in my past.
And I prayed.

I prayed for hours,
Asking God to put someone in my life
to help me kill the piercing suicidal thoughts
and bring me out of my mental blight.
Listing, audibly, all the characteristics
of my dream girl, my one and only angel.
Painfully hoping that at that precise moment that
my angel was coincidentally praying
the exact prayer only steered at me.

I waited for so long,
nearing blaspheme.
Then it happened
my prayer was answered.

I remember the day like it was yesterday.
Near closing time, I walked in to a restaurant
I had never tried and was seated near the door.
I was awaiting my server.
Sadly looking around,
observing my new surrounding.
When I saw a door swing near the kitchen
and there she was.

She was so amazingly gorgeous
My eyes told my brain I was hallucinating.
They were so very wrong.
She were so perfect.
I observed her the whole night.
I noticed that when she walked
her hips would sway ever so gently
as if they were dancing to the beat of her footsteps.
I saw the way her hair ran playfully around her face.
And how I could see her eyes sparkle from across the room.

I stared at her
waiting for her to return my look.
Finally, her head rose and our eyes met.
My heart raced.
I wanted to look down in embarrassment
but I couldn't.
I was mesmerized by her beauty.
I swear for that split second
I could read her thoughts.
See her hopes and wishes.
Hear her prayers.

I knew when our faces were parallel
and our souls briefly united.
That I had found a perfect match for myself.
I knew from that precise moment
that I had found my dream girl.
I had found the other half of my being.
I had found my one and only.
My angel.
 
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