( for Sean )


sunrise sings through my eastern window,
eaves dropping on my wayward dreams-
I feel like I am sister to the Phoenix, mother to the curse of Icarus.

I break sound barriers and preach miracles against the day
and the year,
shatter and scatter myself thin,
sew the fraying hemline with threads of my own hair,
losing strength and will-
you are not from here
and so uncomfortable
but
when I shower,
I'm invincible-
nothing can touch my righteous halo
or dirty to hell my clean.

science tells me I'm dying,
my brain is sending out chemicals to make me age,
wither and fade-
I will start wetting myself and lose track of the memories,
my children will have to remember for me-
they'll have to tell me the same stories
I exhausted for them,
so I can remember saving the world in my own day.

autumn always makes me melancholy with just a hint of
nostalgia accenting the edges-
I start looking through scrapbooks
and timeless photographs-
everyone does
and I'm tied and bound to every life who ever has.

when I shower I look at you
with my eyes closed,
you are Atlas out of place in a modern world-
I scream at myself for myself because the heavy air
echoes the awkwardness of reality better in here-
I get soaked,
apathy penetrates to the bone-
washing away the candy-coated sigh
to the winter in the core.

 
Copyright © amberlee, All Rights Reserved