I guess it was on Tuesday
and I just walked in the house.
The wife ran up a screaming,
that she just saw a mouse.

And then it all made since,
I thought while standing there.
Now that explains the holes,
in our socks and underwear.

The wife and kids went packin'.
They went to visit with some friends.
Which brings me to the mouse
and where my hell begins.

It should've been real easy,
grab some cheese and set some traps.
But, when I went to check them,
my whole day turned to crap.

That mouse had took some grease
and smeared it walls to door.
Those traps snapped one by one,
as I slipped and hit the floor.

Son, now let me tell you,
those things hurt like no one knows.
And when I finally got up,
I had traps from head to toes.

Then it chewed the phone cord,
then chewed up my wife's trunk.
Then somehow drank all my beer,
boy that mouse was drunk.

When I got the last trap off,
I looked up and filled with fear.
He staggered up the counter
and made his hunger crystal clear.

I would'nt of believed it,
but I saw with my good eye.
He stuck his intoxicated paws,
in my wifes fresh baked apple pie.

Then my wife come in the door,
she looked at all the mess.
She's never said such things,
in 15 yrs. of wed'd bless.

She saw the cluttered traps,
then saw the chewed up cord.
But, when she saw her apple pie,
the foul words really poured.

Then things got even worse
and let me tell you why.
That mouse ran up her leg
and stopped around her thigh.

Man, she started going crazy
and flopped 'round like a fish.
I thought it kind of funny,
till she hit me with a dish.

She wore holes in the rug
and pounded on the wall.
I yelled "What's the matter hun?"
She said, "The mouse is in my bra!"

She grabbed my head in fear
and shook it side to side.
I sure do wish that mouse,
would find another place to hide.

Then, he finally made it out.
That mouse took off like a rocket.
The wife still shook my head till,
I thought my eyes would leave thier sockets.

He finally left the house
Boy, he sure can run.
Can't really blame him though,
the wife did have a gun.

She shot holes in the wall,
she shot her Baker Rack.
That mouse ran down the street
and has never made it back.

I still have'nt brought it up.
Thought the wife went through enough.
Not to mention I'm still busy,
'cause we had alot of broken stuff.

Well... now that's my story
and I'm still working on the house.
That's was my day in hell.
The day my wife saw a mouse.





 
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