I'm tired of dragging myself on everyday.
I'm 16, with the wisdom of old age.
I've known hurt, and I've felt pain.
I've cut my wrists, and I've knicked a vein.
How do I wake up everyday?
I hate my life in everyway!
I look into the mirror, and don't know the person looking back.
I smile, and pretend my lifes on track.
I'm never good enough for anyone.
I can't do anything right.
I don't want this life, and I hate putting up a fight.
Please stop making me believe everythings fine.
When you have no idea whats going on in my mind.
I'm too strong to cry, but I'm tired of this fake smile.
No one knows I'm hurt, and their all in denial.
I'm dying inside, and no one knows.
How much the hate inside grows.
I have to stop the tears.
Before they begin to shed.
I guess this is the path I have lead.
I'm scared of death.
Even more of this life.
What if I never make it?
What if I fail?
I'm scared even more to prevail.
Because then I'll be noticed.
I'll stand out in a crowd.
Then I'll be more likely to be let down.
Why do I feel like this?
Why am I the one with all the pain?
If I draw attention to it I will be vain.
I wonder if it's because I'm different.
Or such an outcast!
The whispers and comments start to build up.
They were nicer when I didn't exist.
All of this makes me want to take a knife to my wrist.
I can't fight all of these people.
I just want to wake up, and pretend this is not real.
Every put-down I feel.
I'm beginning to miss the happiness.
But I'm only surrounded by memories...
Memories of smiles
Memories of laughs
Memories of friends
Memories of him...
They make me hurt more.
Because they are all gone.
I'm left alone!
But I'll drag myself on everyday....
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