falling down, deep and dark
like alice in the rabbit hole
tumbling and stumbling all about
trying grip reality whole
but this is a different kind of wonderland
filled with new voices and sounds
all so evil, critical and hurtful
trying to bring me down
they curse at me, hatefully
i cover my ears to drown them out
but like poor alice in the rabbit hole
i simply stumble all about
"alice dear, are you okay?"
is that really Mother's voice?
the other voices in my head
screaming the hurt is my choice
"she's the queen of hearts!" they hiss and seethe
her words form to "off with her head!"
drowning in this; i cannot breathe
as this confuses me once again
locked away in the queen's prison
thrown in a padded room
strapped up in a straight-jacket
hoping this will all end soon
somehow escaped my death penalty
now being taken by the cheshire cat
i find myself upon the streets
as the voices all come back
"go away!" i scream
while the mad hatter and tweedle twins stare
i just look back at them wondering aloud
telling myself that i don't care
"alice," they scream into my ears
you're nothing but a stupid bitch,
no one cares about you they never will
just go jump off of a bridge."
i look over and there's the bridge
crossing the icy, winter river
is it a trick? the voices hate me,
but my soul i shall deliver
trust me i suddenly hear
this is a new voice to me
the other ones curse trying to drown it out
but still it's words set me free
i back away slowly, when gentle hands
are felt upon my shoulder
i turn to see a soft smile
but he has a grip as strong as a boulder
he kindly points me in another direction
and stupidly i follow
i want to run far away
but my mind is blank and hollow
is this perhaps another trick?
was he sent by the queen of hearts?
does he know where the white rabbit is?
or that my wonderland is falling apart?
i think all of the fear has gotten to me
because that's the last thing i remember
when i awoke i was in a bed
and i instantly looked in the mirror
everything on the other side was completely backwards
sort of like my brain
people even said it themselves
a schitzophreniac; that i'm insane
suddenly i thought if i crossed over
maybe then i'd be normal on the other side
if everything over there was wrong
maybe there i'd be right
that's the problem all along
i was in the wrong reality
i have to go where thinking bacwards
and hearing voices is all normalcy
but alice never made it through
she died out on the streets
consumed and eaten away by her own fears;
so surreal, yet so bleak

a/n: i wrote this piece based around a book i'm reading entitled
"finding alice"
 
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