was i not just three
for the pain i was put through
being yelled at,
being knocked around,
across the table,
and on to the ground,
slammed in to the wall
and slapped across the face
was i not just 3
but only two
i can remember so much
i can remember nothing at all


my mother gave me up
she said should she couldn't take it
what was there to take

i got off the ground, spiting up blood
telling her i loved her, to the best i could
I still love you momy, though you hate me so
i still love you mommy, though you treat me this way
I still love you mommy

tears streaming down my face as
she took me away
to put me in a home, till this very day

Hell ive seen and,......... Death i want

as ive been here
ive had nothing but fear

Now im three and theres hell to pay
my new mommy, had a bad day
Comes home screaming,
Comes home Crying,
as i try to find out what the matter
she slaps me across the face
as i fall to the ground
i have nothing to say
she tells me to go out side
when i was to young to be thinking of suicide ( i was)
for i knew not of what it was
i just wanted to die

to leave this world, as i would cry

ive never had a real birthday party
as she would always wake me up
yelling "get my *** out of bed"
i'd end up crying as thats all i could do
the party ended early
as soon as id go inside she would start.

by the time i ever hit seven i knew what Suicide was

as i just hit seven
i already been beaten to the ground
and as i turned seven
were getting a new house
with stairs from the basement
i got to know each one perfectly
everytime she'd come home So mad i run and hide
to the first one i'd find
sometimes out in the open
to were she walked right passed
takeing pills as though water

kicked down the steps
and beaten at the bottom

as i find she left after passing out
i couldn't move so i stayed still

ive beed slapped down the same stairs

even pushed to were i only hit the bottom five

and both my wrists have been broken

and healed so verry wrong
now the bone sticks out
and know one knows at all

by the time i was eight i was not afrade of storms

for that time everytime a bad storm came
i was always pushed out side
off the porch
and in to the Field
are land is big enough
to were id fall asleep in the dark stormy night
and get better sleep out there
than in my own verry room
My fear of storms are gone
so now i fear nothing at all
and it seams that my age never changed
just a new mommy
now im sixteen
i rule this house

and was i just not 3
you tell me
 
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