Five, four, three, two, one
I count down ‘till the yelling’s done
And then my eyes get very moist
My throat dries up, loss of voice
The empty void in my heart
Beats so lonely, so very hard
Why can’t you love me for me?
Why can’t we get along happily?
A penny for your thoughts
What is wrong and what is not
These screaming words that you’ve said
Are like a forever replay in my head
No mute button, not even a pause
Every other thought is at a loss
Creating madness, all these years
Fulfilled my sorrows, all my fears
But you will sooner see me die
You’ll never watch me cry
Won’t let you see the scars you gave me
Because I know that you cannot save me
You don’t know how much you tear me up inside
The things I don’t say, the things I hide
For every tears that’s fallen, I admit I’ve lied
”I’ve just been coughing” “No, I’ve never cried”
I lie and I lie and they don’t mean a thing
My sanity hanging from one thin string
And my aching soul itches at my skin
Poking my soft points like a thousand pins
A rising aggravation lighting a fire inside me
A burning fever that seems so enlightening
Frequently ticking like a bomb just waiting
Me at a fork in the road, still debating
How do I tell you I hate you without sounding so wrong
Can you think of a nice way to say “I hate you, mom.”
Forgive me for sinning but I disagree
A mother isn’t a mother if she isn’t loving
Tell me I’m nothing, a hopeless case
I wish I could say these words to your face
I hate you, I hate you, I hope life will take you
To hell and back so that the devil can make you
Suffer the pain you made me endure
A disease with a never found cure
Kiss my forehead and say goodnight
A kiss that feels more like a bite
I take all the crap and give a little back
But every second I feel more like a maniac
It’s not a family anymore, not too obvious
God can’t force you to continue loving us
The more independent, the more far apart
Aim for the target, then throw the damn dart
Hit you with reality, Tell you what’s inside of me
No memories to tie me down
No string to hold up this frown
Read my lips and hear me clearly
I no longer hold you dear to me
If the devil himself cut your life string, so pitiful
You wouldn’t see my face at your funeral
And when you die, no need to leave money in the papers
Because you know that I’ll, just love that you left altogether

 
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