I defend the cause of my God yet i fall into these wicked holes that stir
even the darkest night.
Ashamed to hear the sound of my own voice defending the truth of my maker
when I'm dragging chains heavy set evolved from sins i kept quiet.
When the blood i was covered in is dried away with the world promising
deceased lies to contempt me so promisingly guarantee me death and no place
in Zion; Trust that i wont see pearl gates open before me to welcome a faith
that held its place for so long.
Now i believe I'm a human with nothing to give ....accepted the fact
that no one saw the beauty that i held within but only the ruff skin that
didn't flatter most eyes .Now even that very beauty inside is gone
wilted away easily overcome with shades of gray affiliated with a sense of
"blah." The only word that i could find to describe it so
perfectly plain and at the same time showing you the very idea of my life.
Even writing about such pain and depression fills me with annoyance to have
to live so uncomfortably with these beings that inhabit the earth. the only
thing That flows so beautifully to them is ignorance
with what depth do i respond when they shutter at the thought of being wrong
 
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