Two years now,
I’ve moved on in every way.
Two years and I’ll shout it out loud,
Because I move farther away every day.
But I still remember everything,
I remember hitting a pipe until my lips bleed,
The tweaker craters and the burns,
How bad my world turned.

I remember the van belonging to a felon,
Sitting in it spinning the pipe,
I remember chasing the dragon
And getting higher then any kite.
I remember the horrible yet intricate drawings,
I remember you kissing me and saying “Darling,”
Saying things sweet and leading me on.
I remember the track marks on your arm.

Maybe it would have been easier,
If I hadn’t seen you running around looking for a bone;
If I hadn’t see you getting sleazier,
Or maybe if I hadn’t suffered through sobriety alone.
Those first few months were terror,
I lived through it feeling like a specter.
I have to admit I fell back on weed,
I have to admit that looking at you made me feel weak.

The thing about you I couldn’t stand
Is that I got out and you stayed in,
That you stayed in school and I got banned,
That everyone around me threw me in the trash bin.
But people helped you, kept you out of trouble.
My parents shipped me off on the double.
But I had already gotten through it,
I had already crawled out of hell’s pit.

I see you now walking around; acting like you had it rough,
That you act like I must have been brought out by fate.
Your boyfriend did it with you, I didn’t have anyone.
Now you walk around saying how you are straight;
You were the one that said loving girls was fine,
The one that taught me there were minds out there like mine.
I like to think you served your purpose,
You opened me up to these feelings that used to be torment.

Now I look at you and laugh inside,
Every time I look in your direction.
You will be used up by twenty five,
Because being a slut doesn’t come with a retirement pension.
You did that shit so much longer then me,
You are soon going to have to pay the fee.
Already you have lost your beauty,
And from not spinning have gained two booties.


From this I have gained a new set of eyes,
I can see the broken soul and gutter children
I can see through your kind’s type of lies.
And can look beyond making myself into a needle pincushion.
You are always the victim, always the sick puppy in the pound,
Yet at the same time you bring others down.
You tell good little girls its okay to put out,
Even if their too naïve to see that man’s pi snout.

Two years have past now,
And I’ve risen above.
Two years since I put the pipe down,
Two years since you were my dove.
Two years since I chased that dragon,
And since I noticed your morals were lackin’.
You see when I stood on the outside and looked in
I could see that those who did as we did will never win.

 
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