Life is like an endless dream.
Never stopping.
Never slowing.
Never waking up.
There are millions of people in my head.
But when I look for myself I’m not there.
Its like I’m in a field and I’m the only one there,
And in my head is a city full of people and I’m nowhere to be found.
I am everything but yet I’m nothing. There are voices in my head of people I
know that I put there and I have conversations with myself. Life for me is
hard because I’m stuck in something I can’t get out.
How I wish I could be normal but I can’t. I try but it doesn’t work.
Get these voices out of my head! I put them there and they create a life all
there own.
Life is too hard for me. I… am … stuck… I can’t get out of it. All my life
I’ve had talent that was useless to me. But to no one else. I wish I knew
what was wrong with me.
I can’t seem to figure it out. I have all of these emotions that I don’t
even use. I can’t love, I can’t hate, I can’t even grieve and I don’t know
why. It’s like a movie. Someone might say that I have a great life. I’m a
bit lazy, but still a great life. I have two bands, a roof over my head, and
a few good things going for me. But I don’t want it. If only others could
see what I see, then. Only then could the y start to understand what I feel.
But until then… No one knows. Know one knows who I really am. I will keep
living my life this way not knowing how to change it. Or how to keep myself
happy. I will never know how.
Pain, suffering, confusion. It will all be there with me. It always has, it
always will. It’s getting late, so I must retire. I only wish I could figure
this out. I think I never will.

 
Copyright © baalthebetrayer, All Rights Reserved